


Rehabilitation

by orphan_account



Category: Marvel, Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Loki/Tony Stark, Eventual Romance, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Intersex Loki, Loki Needs a Hug, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Post-Thor: The Dark World, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-17
Updated: 2015-03-01
Packaged: 2018-03-07 21:23:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 13,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3183668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony was more than happy to hear that Loki was dead. When it turned out that the trickster god was still alive and he was appointed to keep Loki company in a run-down asylum on Asgard, however, he wanted to scream. But as time goes on, he starts to question Asgard's ethics for treating the insane.</p><p>This is a reposting of a fic I deleted on accident.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I deleted this fic on accident, so I cannot thank the lovely user Sealcat enough for restoring it to me!

"Wait, so you're telling me that asshole is still alive?" Tony practically yelled into his phone.

"Unfortunately, yes," Natasha sighed. "It turns out that Loki faked his death and usurped the throne of Asgard by shapeshifting to Odin, the king. However, one of Thor's friends figured out that 'Odin' was acting different. She forced Loki to drop his illusion, and Bag of Cats was put on trial. He was deemed criminally insane and locked up in one of Asgard's asylums."

"Well, that makes me feel a bit better," Tony said. "But only a bit. So why are you calling me?"

"Thor requested that you keep Loki company and help him cope with his mental illness... well, mental _illnesses."_

Tony went silent, too stunned to say anything for a moment. He wanted to scream at Natasha, but he knew it wasn't her fault. She was just playing the role of the messenger, but the message felt more like a blow from Mjolnir rather than a simple announcement. "Fabio really expects me to look after that son of a bitch?!"

"Yes, and I would advise you not to speak of the late queen of Asgard that way. Upon her death, Loki went off the deep end, and his instability turned into full-blown mental illness."

"What do you expect me to do? Give him hugs and hope that he doesn't stab me? Be his therapist? I can't do this, Nat. I really can't."

"I believe you can. Look, there's something else I have to say, but I really don't want to say it..." Natasha trailed off.

"What is it?"

"I was going to delay telling you this, but I had to tell it to you now, because... well, the ethics in the particular asylum Loki is in are quite questionable. I can't even say what I heard happened because of how sickening it is and because I need to protect Loki's confidentiality. As much as I dislike him, he doesn't deserve what one of the..."

"What one of the what?"

"Never mind. You'll see it yourself."

Tony hung up out of anger, wondering what Natasha was hiding from him. He heard footsteps coming in his direction and saw Thor walking over to him. Normally, the thunder god looked like a ray of sunshine with golden hair and a small smile, but on that day, he looked solemn.

"What's wrong, buddy?" Tony asked.

"You'll see when I bring you to Asgard."

Thor took him outside to a spot where a strange design was carved into the ground. The design was glowing a deep crimson red and when Thor and Tony walked onto it, Tony felt a vibration from it. Suddenly, Tony was practically flying through a beam of multicolored flashing light.

Upon arriving in what looked like a golden observatory, Tony nearly threw up from motion sickness. However, he was able to stifle the urge to vomit, mostly because he was standing a few feet away from a strong-looking, dark-skinned man with the most captivating, strangely orange eyes he had ever seen. He didn't want to throw up in front of someone who looked so important.

"Welcome to Asgard," the man said with a gentle smile.

"This is Heimdall, Stark," Thor said before leading Tony across what could only be described as a flashing rainbow bridge. Tony looked at Asgard's sky in awe at the stars and nebulae he could see in the night sky.

"This place is beautiful," Tony said.

"Indeed it is, but the asylum my brother is in is a different story entirely," Thor said with a slight frown. The thunder god's expression was unusual to Tony, seeing as how he was normally content and happy to see the Avengers.

It took a long walk, but eventually, they entered a musty hallway lined with small white rooms that looked more like prison cells than rooms for patients. Most of those patients were sleeping.

"Just go straight down the hall and to the right you'll see Loki's room," Thor told Tony. "I will not be coming with you because I don't want to upset him. I wish you luck, Stark."

Thor walked away and Tony sighed, mentally preparing himself for seeing the same Norse god who had thrown him out of his own penthouse window. Though he wasn't sure why he hadn't noticed it before, he could hear the pitiful sound of a baby crying. The noise made Tony shudder - why was there an infant in an asylum, especially such a poorly maintained one? There were cracks in the walls, and the whole place reeked of a smell Tony couldn't quite put his finger on.

Though he was sure that what he was going to see wouldn't be pretty, he kept going until he reached Loki's cell. He stood in shock for what felt like forever as he took in what he saw before him.

Loki looked only what Tony could describe as broken. His hair was long and matted, and the clothes he wore were practically rags. He was so emaciated that his ribs, hipbones, and collarbones stuck out and his prominent cheekbones were even sharper than they were the last time Tony saw him. Worst of all, he was holding a tiny baby that was crying uncontrollably.

"Shhh, shh, it's okay," Loki was whispering to the baby in his bony arms over and over again. "I know, I know, you're hungry. But I can't feed you when I'm in this state. If I wasn't starving, I'd give you some milk, but I can't. Not like this. Please stop crying..."

Maybe it was just the sight of an infant crying so desperately, but Tony felt like he was going to cry himself. He carefully stepped towards Loki's cell and got on his knees so he was eye-level with Loki, who was sitting on the floor of his room. He shuddered when he saw the half-dried blood on the floor under Loki's legs. "Hey. I'm Tony Stark... do you remember me?"

Loki took his eyes off of the baby - Tony wasn't going to accept the fact that Loki probably somehow birthed it - and whimpered when he saw Tony. "P-please don't hurt me! But especially don't hurt my baby!"

Tony never expected to feel such a way, but he was actually starting to feel bad for Loki. Even after all he had done, Tony admitted to himself that Loki didn't deserve this.

"I'm not going to hurt you or the - I mean your - baby," Tony said as gently as he could. He tried to convince himself to believe the lie that it wasn't Loki's baby. No, he must have taken in a woman's baby, one the woman couldn't take care of. It wasn't his. It wasn't possible. Loki was a guy, but then again, Tony had never heard of female frost giants. "Thor sent me to keep you company and I guess be your therapist."

"Thor?" Loki said, a shiny film of tears covering his hunger-glazed eyes. "Why did he send you? He only visited me once! He doesn't care about me anymore, not after all I've done."

"He must care about you if he sent me to help you," Tony said. "Look, I'm not happy about this either. I really don't want to be around you."

"Rightfully so."

Tony's eyes widened slightly in shock - the last time he saw Loki, he saw a narcissist. This Loki was different, and by his words, it sounded as if he actually had grown to hate himself. "Look, even if I don't like you, I'll help you. Mostly because I don't want to get a hammer blow to the head from your br- I mean Thor. But also because I can't take seeing that poor baby upset. I don't know why, because it's not like I'm a parent, but I can't take any more crying from it. Is... is it yours?"

"Yes. It's a she."

"But... how did you give birth to her? You're a guy."

A dangerous look of anger, possibly defensiveness, flashed in Loki's eyes. "You don't need to know how I birthed her."

"Okay, okay," Tony said, raising his hands in the air. "I'm sorry. Does she... does she have a name?"

"No. No, she doesn't. I'm not sure what to name her."

"Well, you should."

"I don't know if I should, considering she's the child of a... of..."

Loki burst into tears, which made the baby cry again.

"Did one of the healers here... rape you?"

Loki gave a nod and started to cry harder. Oddly, instead of making him feel satisfied, seeing Loki cry wrenched at Tony's heartstrings. He tried to tell himself that he didn't have any sympathy for Loki, that he was a criminal and he deserved such treatment, but he knew no one deserved to be raped, and especially not to have a child from being violated.

"He gave me some medicine to help me sleep in exchange for having sex with me," Loki sniffled. "I said no, but he took advantage of me anyway. I got the medicine and tried to kill myself by taking all of it, but the other healers caught me pouring out the pills into my hand. About nine months later, I gave birth to this poor baby. It was bloody and I was terrified, but neither one of us died from it. I'm not sure whether I should be thankful for that or not."

Tony took all of what Loki said in for a moment before entering Loki's cell. The broken god flinched, and Tony had to tell himself again that he was not feeling any sympathy for the man who caused his PTSD, but he was having a hard time convincing himself of that after what he had just heard and seeing the flinch. He gently took the baby in his arms and Loki panicked.

"No! Give her back! Please don't take my baby away from me!" Loki screamed.

"You're unable to take care of her," Tony said. "She needs access to either formula or breastmilk, neither of which you can provide right now. I'm going to give her to someone who can take care of her properly."

"NO! COME BACK!" Loki sobbed as Tony started to walk away. Tony second-guessed his decision and eventually came back and handed the baby to him, mostly because he couldn't take Loki's crying.

Tony took off his shirt - he was wearing a white tank top underneath it as an undershirt - and swaddled the crying baby in it. Soon, the infant had stopped crying and fell asleep in Loki's arms. To Tony's surprise, Loki smiled.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you," Loki said quietly. "It's just that... she's all I have left. I've lost everything else, including my sanity."

"Don't worry about it," Tony replied. "Look, I still don't like you, but I'm not going to let your baby die from hunger. I'll help you take care of her. Is that okay with you?"

"It's more than okay," Loki said, sounding like he was going to cry, but this time, from relief. "Thank you so much."

"No problem. But why are you so skinny?" Tony asked.

"They deprive me of food and a bed to sleep in because of what I've done," Loki answered. "They consider me undeserving of even some of the basic necessities because of all the things I've done."

Tony shuddered and said, "That's sick. Look, I can't have you die when I'm supposed to be taking care of you. I'll sneak you some food every day and get some formula for your baby."

"Thank you," Loki said. "Thank you so much."

Tony gave Loki a smile in an attempt to get one back, and he did.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony starts taking care of Loki and begins to understand him more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a dialogue-heavy chapter because Tony is starting to talk with Loki to comfort him.

"Why are you here, truly?" Loki asked Tony, still holding his baby. "I doubt that you don't have an ulterior motive."

"Actually, I don't," Tony replied curtly. "I really am supposed to keep you company here, since they've isolated you from everyone else. Why did they do that? You're not exactly dangerous in the state you're in."

Loki's eyes narrowed slightly as he said, "So you're saying that I'm weak?"

"No, I never said that. I meant you're not as dangerous as you usually are."

With his anger now gone, Loki said, "They isolate me as a punishment. It seems rather foolish though, seeing as anyone will go insane after a long time without social contact. In my case, I suppose I'm going more insane."

"They don't seem like they want to help you or cure you," Tony muttered, feeling a pang of anger for a reason he didn't want to acknowledge. "They seem like they want to torture you. Not by beating you up, but by depriving you of your needs. I think starving someone is considered a form of torture, but I'm not sure. It seems like one, though."

"And it feels like one too," Loki responded. "But I don't care about them starving me as much as I care about my baby not having any food. I don't want her to die. I know she wasn't conceived intentionally, but I feel connected to her, as if in the case that we were separated, I'd feel empty. That makes me sound pathetic, though."

"You're not pathetic," Tony told Loki. "You're just mistreated. I'll go run out to get you some food from one of Asgard's markets. I'll also get your baby some formula."

"Thank you," Loki said, looking like he was about to cry from happiness. "Thank you so much."

Tony came back with some bread, berries, and crackers, as well as formula, which he had put some in a bottle. He entered Loki's cell and gave it all to him. "Just don't eat too fast or you'll get sick."

"Food," Loki said distantly. "Oh, thank you, Tony! It's been so long since I've gotten to eat."

Loki fed his baby first and then ate some of the food Tony had brought. He noticed that Tony also brought two pillows and two blankets. He watched Tony put the pillows and blankets down in the corner of his room.

"One pillow and one blanket for you and another pillow and blanket for your baby," Tony said, smiling a bit when he saw Loki grin. "So you're not so uncomfortable sleeping on the floor."

"Thank you again," Loki replied. "She and I appreciate it very much."

He gave Tony's shirt back to him and swaddled his baby in one of the blankets, which was pink. He lay the infant down on one of the pillows. His baby fell asleep again fast thanks to the comfort from the items.

"I still feel like she should have a name," Tony said. "I don't know many Norse names, but... how about Iona?"

"That sounds wonderful," Loki said with a slight smile. "She'll be my beautiful daughter, Iona."

"So... what kind of things have they diagnosed you with?" Tony asked hesitantly.

"Mood disorder not otherwise specified and undifferentiated schizophrenia," Loki answered. "They diagnosed that I experience both symptoms of catatonic schizophrenia and paranoid schizophrenia. It's not completely rubbish, though, because I've been having auditory and visual hallucinations and I've gone into states of catatonia. The mood disorder includes depression and fits of rage."

Tony paused for a moment before speaking, taking what Loki said all in. "Anything else?"

"Narcissistic personality disorder," Loki said. "They've also determined that I'm a pathological liar."

"Well, I guess we share some characteristics," Tony replied. "So the mood disorder and personality disorder are why I've seen you go from acting grandiose to being self-loathing?"

Loki nodded and said, "I also have delusions of grandeur from the schizophrenia, which I suppose explains how I was acting in New York. I just... I don't like being insane at all."

"I don't think anyone does," Tony replied honestly. "I just wanted to know so I could try to help you out better. Have they put you on medication?"

"I've had bad reactions to all the medications they tried on me," Loki said. "So I'm not on anything right now, and I probably won't be on anything anytime soon, either because they're too lazy to try anything else on me or because they want me to suffer. Perhaps both."

"They just expect you to be okay with all of the things you're experiencing?"

"Yes."

"Well, this asylum doesn't sound like it's very ethical," Tony muttered. "I know you've done terrible things, but I don't think even you deserve to go through all of that crap. I mean, you're still a person and you still have rights, even after everything you've done. I've heard your mother died rather recently... I'm sorry about that. Are you feeling any grief right now?"

"Yes," Loki responded with a sad look in his hunger-dulled eyes. "I just feel so guilty for her death, because I unintentionally led a monster to her by giving it directions. I didn't know she was in the direction I told him to go, but I still feel guilt for it. She was my biggest support. She taught me my magic, comforted me when I was upset, and treated me with compassion and kindness. Thor was a good support for me too before I started having issues with him, but my mother was able to understand my feelings better. I wish I could talk to her somehow, but because she's gone, I can't do that."

"It must be hard to lose someone so special to you," Tony said. "But eventually, you'll feel better about it. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance - you can be experiencing any of those states at any time, even out of order. I know that you'll eventually move to acceptance, but there isn't any time limit of grief. It can take you a few months or even a few years to accept a loss, but you'll get to accepting it sometime. If I were in your place right now, I would be upset too."

"That makes me feel a bit better," Loki said quietly. "I just wish I could go back in time and change my actions on the day that she died. I know it's useless to wish for something as improbable as that, but I can't help but think about how I could've prevented her death."

"You shouldn't be holding yourself responsible for something you couldn't stop from happening. Doing that will just make it harder for you to cope with it. Trust me, I hold myself responsible for a lot of things that are or were out of my control, and it just makes matters worse. I know everything sucks for you right now, but try to look at things differently and you'll feel a lot better."

"I'll try," Loki replied. "But I don't know if it will help very much."

Loki turned his attention to Iona, who was continuing to sleep on the comfort of the pillow and under the warmth of the blanket. He smiled at her. "Though I wish she wasn't born from me being raped, at least I have another living being to make me feel less alone."

"And you have me too," Tony added.

"Yes, and I appreciate that. I know you don't like me very much still, but it's nice to have contact with someone so I don't go even more insane from isolation."

"I'll bring you and Iona food every day," Tony promised. "I don't want to be responsible for either of you starving to death. Besides, maybe some nourishment will help you feel better. I'm sorry that dick of a healer did what he did to you, but your baby is beautiful and she'll help you feel less lonely."

Loki smiled a bit and said, "I'm tired. I'm going to try to get some sleep."

He lay his head down on his pillow, pulled his blanket over him, and quickly fell asleep out of exhaustion.

About an hour later, when Tony was feeling bored, Loki began to move around and talk in his asleep, saying things like, "no", "stop", and "please, no more". He woke up crying.

"You had a nightmare?" Tony asked.

Loki nodded and said with a sniffle, "About the rape."

"I'm sorry," Tony said with a frown creasing his brow. "But I'll make sure that sicko doesn't hurt you ever again. You didn't deserve that to happen to you, but I promise you'll recover from it. It may take a while, but you'll feel better sometime."

Loki fell back asleep, and Tony took in how young and peaceful he looked while he slept. Soon, he fell asleep too, in his chair.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony decides to help Loki escape from the asylum.

The sound of a baby crying woke Tony up. It woke Loki up as well, who frowned and tried to calm her down.

"She's hungry," Loki said.

Tony got another bottle of formula he had prepared out, but as he handed it to Loki, he heard a woman's voice.

"What are you doing?" the woman asked sternly. "Loki is not supposed to have access to food, and the same goes for his child. Have you been sneaking him food? You're not supposed to do that. Stop that or we'll have to ban you from the asylum."

"Why are you punishing the baby?" Tony snapped. "I know why you're punishing him, but the baby hasn't done anything wrong! She deserves food! And even with what Loki's done, isn't it cruel and unusual punishment to deny him food?"

The woman stepped into the cell and took away the bottle as well as the food Tony had gotten for Loki. Iona started crying louder, which made Loki panic. Something inside Tony sparked a fire of anger within him, and as the woman walked away, he quietly told Loki, "I'm getting you out of here. They probably won't let me sign you out of here because I'm not your legal guardian, but I'm going to help you escape."

"How?" Loki asked, shaking slightly. "How are you going to get away with that? And where would I go after that? You can't go with your impulses like that. You could get in trouble, and I don't want yet another thing to be my fault."

"You have magic, right? Well, you could put up an illusion of you sleeping in your cell while the real you escapes with me, along with your baby. I know that it will take a lot of energy out of you because you're hungry, but it's the only way you're getting out of here anytime soon."

Loki considered Tony's words for a moment and said, "Okay."

He gently grabbed Iona, quietly stepped out of his cell, and put the illusion up. He cast a spell to conceal himself, Tony, and Iona as they started walking down the hall heading out of the asylum. Because of how exhausted Loki was, the spell wasn't as solid as it would be usually, and it flickered a little. A guard noticed, but when Tony paid him not to tell the other guards in the Asgardian coins Thor gave him, he didn't say a word about it.

It was surprisingly easy to escape from the dank expanses of the asylum, but Tony could tell that even though he would be free soon, Loki was upset. He was trembling a lot now, and he looked as if he was about to cry.

"What's wrong?" Tony asked. "You're almost free. Aren't you happy about that?"

"Yes, I am. I just had a nightmare when I was sleeping. It was a bad one. Where are you taking me?"

"To Stark Tower."

"What?" Loki gasped. "Are you insane? I can't be in New York, not after I nearly decimated the city!"

"Am I insane? You're the one who was locked in an asylum a few minutes ago."

The snide remark Tony made on an impulse was enough to send the tears in Loki's eyes falling. Tony suddenly felt terribly guilty and tried to soothe Loki. "Damn it, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I'm just a smartass. You know that, right? Loki, I'm sorry. Please stop. I can't take crying."

Loki wasn't able to stop crying, but he tried his best to keep his crying quiet. Tony realized there was a crucial part of getting back to Earth that he had forgotten - how were they going to get past Heimdall? Tony cursed himself for not thinking of it but did some quick thinking before he crossed the rainbow bridge with Loki, who was holding a sleeping Iona in his arms. He decided to lie that Thor wanted Loki and him back on Earth, where the thunder god was currently staying in Jane Foster's apartment.

He told his lie to Heimdall and surprisingly, it worked. Soon, Tony was back on Earth. Loki looked pale, as if he was going to pass out, but he was able to put the concealment spell back on and hold it until they reached Tony's penthouse.

"Please don't throw me out the window again," Tony said as Loki flopped down on the couch. He had put Iona on a comfortable-looking armchair with a pillow under her head and the baby was already fast asleep. "You know, I still owe you a drink. Pick your poison - I have scotch, vodka, beer, whatever you want."

"I want vodka," Loki replied. Tony poured him a glass of Russian vodka, a gift from Natasha. Loki downed it, requested another, and downed that one. He then took the bottle, and to Tony's dismay, drank all of it.

"Dude, you're going to have a massive hangover," Tony said.

"I don't care," Loki slurred. It was obvious that he was very drunk. He tried getting up but fell back on the couch.

"Easy there, I don't want you falling over and cracking your head open. Loki, you should rest. I don't want you doing stupid things while you're drunk."

"I've heard that you don't exactly follow what you just said."

"Shut up and get some rest. I'll take care of Iona."

Loki turned to his side on the couch and quickly fell asleep. Meanwhile, Tony ordered formula and food from every food group so Loki would get some good nourishment. Though he wasn't the best at cooking, he prepared grilled chicken breast and a salad while Loki was sleeping. When Loki woke up, he was still drunk and disoriented. Tony gave him the food, which he devoured, but promptly threw up after he had eaten it. Tony cursed, remembering that after being starved for a while, one's stomach won't handle food well. Either that was the case or the vomiting was from how drunk Loki was, but either way, Tony had to clean up the vomit. He gave Loki a look that channeled _what-am-I-going-to-do-with-you,_ but Loki didn't seem to notice it.

"You still look kind of upset," Tony remarked. "Do you want to talk about what's bothering you?"

Loki nodded and ended up spilling his guts to Tony. Normally, he would be closed off and reluctant to talk, but being drunk seemed to get rid of that. He talked to Tony about practically everything that had been bothering him since New York. Most of the talk consisted of his mental health issues and his trouble dealing with the grief from losing his mother. Though Tony wasn't good at playing the part of a therapist, he listened to Loki and comforted him whenever he got noticeably upset. Eventually, Loki passed out from being so drunk, leaving Tony to feed Iona.

After being fed, Iona seemed calm, even a bit happy by the way she was babbling and smiling. The sight made Tony smile, and he felt an odd instinct to take care of her even though he wasn't her father. While Loki was knocked out, Tony held her, smiling wider when the baby fell asleep in his arms, sometimes twitching a bit in the cutest way.

When Loki woke up, he complained of a pounding headache as well as body aches. Tony told him he had warned him, but Loki just rolled his eyes and asked for pain medication, which Tony gave him.

"So, I don't really have a plan as to how I'm going to keep you here, but I'll try to work something out," Tony promised Loki. "Where would you like to stay here? I have a spare room with a bed for you to sleep in, of course, and a TV for when you get bored."

"What's a TV?" Loki asked.

"It's an electronic appliance that lets you watch recorded videos, I guess you could call them," Tony explained. "There's comedy shows, drama, and sometimes movies. You should be able to figure it out pretty easily. Oh, and there's also a closet, which you could hide in if any one of the Avengers comes to visit."

Loki nodded and carefully walked over to where Iona was sleeping on the chair again. Loki gently took her in his arms, and though she didn't wake up, rocked her back in forth in his arms, quietly singing what sounded like a lullaby in a language Tony had never heard before - Old Norse, he guessed.

"You seem to really love her," Tony said. "Well, that's good. I thought you would have had some postpartum depression considering the circumstances under which she was born, but you absolutely adore her, which is great. And I see why - she's adorable, especially with that fuzzy black hair she has. She looks a lot like you."

"She'll be a very pretty girl," Loki said with a smile. "I wonder what color her eyes would be. Her biological father's eyes were brown... I just hope she doesn't have brown eyes, because that would remind me of him."

"She might, but that's fine, because in time, you'll heal from that experience, even with how awful it was," Tony assured Loki. "And I'll do my best to take care of you and her here. I can't promise that I'll be the best cook or the best caretaker in general, but I'll try really hard to meet your needs, as well as your baby's needs."

"Thank you," Loki said, smiling a little. "Thank you so much. You know, despite what some people may say, you do have a heart."

Tony smiled and went to his workshop to build a crib for Iona.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony attempts to get Loki mental help.

Because he wasn't as good working with wood as he was with metal, the crib took hours for Tony to complete it. When he was finished, he painted it a very light pink and went back to his penthouse. He saw that Iona was on the couch, sleeping on the pillow Tony had got for her. She looked content and relaxed under the pink blanket Tony had brought her back in the asylum. The sight made Tony smile - she had a cute little button nose, an adorably round face, and wisps of black hair. He promised to himself that he would get her baby clothes and things to play with as soon as he could. Suddenly, Tony noticed the sound of someone crying and sighed when he realized Loki had to have been the one crying. He couldn't handle crying at all, and he still didn't know how to comfort the same man who had thrown him out of his own window. He quietly made his way into Loki's new room and frowned at the sight he saw before him.

Loki had his knees hugged to his chest and was crying into them. He was fitting the stereotype of a mentally ill person by rocking back and forth in an attempt to soothe himself. His eyes were unfocused, and even more glazed than they usually were ever since he had been deprived of food. Tony walked over to him and sat on the bed next to him. "What's wrong?"

To Tony's dismay, Loki asked, "Are you real?"

"Of course I'm real," Tony said, feeling a little confused by Loki's question. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because sometimes when I hallucinate, I see people," Loki replied. "But when I try to talk to them, I realize they're not real."

Tony didn't know what to say to that, so he just asked again, "What's wrong?"

"They won't stop. They just won't stop."

"Who won't stop?"

"The voices in my head," Loki said as he started to tremble. "They won't shut up, and they're saying terrible things to me. Insults, slurs, mocking remarks, you name it. I can't stand them."

"You probably need to be on some kind of antipsychotic," Tony responded. "But I can't take you to a regular psychiatrist and the only doctor I actually trust is the one whose alter ego smashed you into the floor. But I promise that won't happen again. Do you want me to call him?"

"But your friends will find out about me if you call him!" Loki exclaimed, starting to panic. "I mean, I want it to stop, but what if he tells them about me?"

"He won't," Tony promised. "I'll make sure this is 100% confidential. Besides, the rest of my team members are out on their own missions right now. You'll be safe, I promise."

Loki nodded but didn't stop crying. "Tony? C-Can you hold me? Please."

Tony felt a little awkward hearing that because he had little experience comforting people, but he hugged Loki and held him as he shook and cried. He gently pat his back and stroked his hair to calm him down. It took a while, but eventually, those two things calmed Loki down enough to the point where he wasn't crying anymore. "Thank you."

Tony nodded and went back down to his workshop to check on the paint. It had dried rather quickly, so he put on a coat of clear gloss over it to seal the paint. While he waited for it to dry, he thought about everything that had happened in the past week. After the phone call with Natasha ended, Tony wanted to yell at Loki and maybe even punch him in the face. Now, he was comforting him and taking care of his baby. What had changed in him so much that Tony went from hating Loki with a passion to helping him and making him feel better?

The gloss had already dried before Tony could even begin to understand that. He carefully brought the crib up into Loki's room and said, "I made it for your cute little girl. I hope she likes it."

Though Loki was exhausted from crying, he smiled and said, "Thank you, Tony. She'll love it."

Tony had padded the crib with crib bedding that he had ordered to the tower. The bedding had little flowers and swirls embroidered into the white fabric, and he had even gotten a little pillow that was the perfect size for Iona's head. "I'll get her some baby clothes and toys as soon as possible, but she should be fine for now. You've been feeding her, right?"

Loki nodded and said, "I'm tired. I don't care if it's noon, I'm going to sleep."

Tony turned the light off as Loki curled up under the covers and quickly fell asleep. He called his friend in science, Bruce Banner, and decided that he should get straight to the point. "Please don't get angry when I say this - Loki's still alive, and he's in Stark Tower."

"Do you need security called?" Bruce said. "How did he get in there and what does he want now?"

"Actually, I brought him here."

"You're kidding me."

"For once, I'm not kidding. It's complicated... I don't really know how to explain what happened. Well, I guess I could start off with this - Loki faked his death and usurped the throne of Asgard, but he was found out and declared criminally insane by Asgard's court. He was sent off to an asylum to be treated for his mental illnesses. But that asylum wasn't a very nice place to be in, at least for him."

Bruce took a moment to process all of the information Tony had given him. "Okay... what made it so bad for him in there?"

"Because of what he did in New York, the staff decided to punish him in cruel and unusual ways, I guess. They didn't give him food, only giving him access to water. They were starving him as punishment for what he did. I saw the place and it was very run-down. They didn't seem to treat the other patients very well either, but I think Loki got the worst treatment because of his actions. I hate to say this part, but I have to say it. Someone... well, a healer, raped him."

There was a pause before Bruce finally responded, "That's sick. Why would someone do that to a patient?"

"I don't know. But... well, this is going to sound crazy, but the healer got him pregnant. He gave birth all alone in that cell with no one to help him with the process. And he couldn't feed the baby because he was completely emaciated and couldn't develop breasts because of that. I'm assuming that the frost giants are dual-sexed, because that's the only way that any of that could've happened."

"So you're taking care of his baby too? Tony, you're a good guy and all, but I can't see you as someone who would be a good caretaker to a baby."

"I know, I know," Tony sighed. "But I have to. I can't let a baby die because I didn't take care of it. And I know Loki would probably kill me if I neglected the poor thing. But anyway, I called you because Loki obviously developed mental health problems and I'm not medically trained to help with that."

"I'm not a psychiatrist," Bruce said. "At least, I don't specialize as one. I know psychiatry, though. I just don't know how medications designed for humans would work on his kind."

"It should be about the same. I would appreciate it if you could come as soon as possible, because Loki had a meltdown just now."

"I'll make it tonight, don't worry."

Tony waited quite impatiently for Bruce to arrive. Meanwhile, Loki was still sleeping as Iona dozed off in her new crib next to his bed. When he heard Bruce enter the penthouse, he gently shook Loki awake. He talked with Bruce for a minute before calling Loki over.

Though Bruce wasn't scared of Loki, his eyes widened when he saw him in such a state. Loki was still wearing the rags he wore in the asylum, and his hair was still unwashed, longer than it had ever been and terribly matted. The food didn't seem to have helped Loki at all, because he was just as dangerously thin as he was when Tony first entered his cell. "Hi, Loki. I'm here to help you."

Loki was trembling and whimpering, a pitiful sound that tugged at Tony's heart, though he told himself that it shouldn't.

"Loki, it's okay," Tony said quietly. "No one's going to hurt you."

Bruce tried to take Loki aside to talk to him, but Loki flinched and tried to get away.

"I'll explain things for you," Tony sighed. "I don't think he's comfortable with you."

Tony rattled off Loki's diagnoses and then talked to Bruce about the behavior Loki had displayed so far. Bruce listened and finally said, "Since I'm not a licensed psychiatrist, I can't prescribe him anything, and I don't think normal meds made for humans are going to work on him. Have you ever thought of creating a medication?"

"What, give him designer drugs?" Tony scoffed. "He already acts like he's on drugs."

Loki gave Tony a look filled with hurt and Tony realized that what he said wasn't very nice. "Loki, I'm sorry. That was rude of me. Please don't take it to heart."

Loki nodded but still looked not unlike a kicked puppy.

"Well, I was thinking that we could study his brain and figure out what the problem is," Bruce continued. "It would take some time, but I think we'd be able to create a medication specially for him."

"I guess we could try," Tony said. "At least it's a new project. I was getting really bored of just tinkering with everything in my workshop. We also should try to learn more about his kind, both Asgardians and frost giants."

Bruce and Tony shook on it, and they both went down to Tony's workshop to brainstorm. Meanwhile, Loki was holding Iona, rocking her back and forth in his arms. The baby was fast asleep, but the motion was soothing to Loki as well, so he kept rocking her anyway.

"I hope I can take care of you," Loki said, his voice choked from tears that were threatening to fall.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony didn't expect for the Avengers to drop by for a visit. They discover Loki and fighting breaks out.

Loki shook Tony awake in the middle of the night, causing the latter to groan and sigh heavily. "Loki, what are you waking me up for?"

"I can't sleep," Loki replied. "The voices won't shut up."

"Well, I can't do anything about that right now," Tony grumbled. "Just try to go to sleep. Bruce and I will start working on a custom medication for you in the morning. That means no coming into the lab, because you might mess it up. When it's time for breakfast, what do you want?"

"Food."

"No, I mean what kind of food," Tony sighed, feeling a little cross from being woken up in the middle of the night. "Anything you want. Pancakes, waffles, French toast, crepes, a bagel or an English muffin... have you had or at least heard of any of those things?"

Loki's eyes widened a bit at all of the options. "I like pancakes."

"I'll make you pancakes then. With chocolate chips in them and syrup on top along with whipped cream. You need some food in you."

Loki thanked Tony and rolled onto his side. Tony started stroking Loki's hair to soothe him, calming him down enough to get the god off to sleep. He fell asleep himself after a few minutes.

In the morning, Tony woke up to the sound of Iona crying. He fed her and then nudged Loki awake. "Time for pancakes, Lokes."

"Do not ever call me that again," Loki grit out. "My name has only two syllables. There's no need for nicknames."

"But it sounds cute," Tony laughed. "Fine, I'll just call you Reindeer Games then. Time for pancakes, Reindeer Games."

Loki gave a dramatic groan and rolled off the bed. He kept rolling on the floor all the way out of the room, making Tony burst into a laughing fit.

"Why are you rolling around?" Tony said as soon as he had stopped laughing.

"Because I feel like it. But I'm not going to roll down the stairs."

Loki got up and went to the kitchen with Tony. He sat at the table while Tony started making chocolate chip pancakes. "Weren't you and Bruce going to start off your morning by working on that medication?"

"You need to be fed first," Tony said. "You're skin and bones."

Soon, Tony had made four pancakes - two for Loki and two for him. He tried to make small talk with Loki as they ate but Loki didn't seem to be in a very talkative mood. Tony figured that he woke up on the wrong side of the bed, though that expression never really made sense to him.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. Tony got up to answer it, his eyes widening when he saw his entire team standing there. "What are you doing? You can't just stop here without telling me you're coming. I have things to work on."

Loki immediately hid in a cabinet when he heard Clint say, "Like that fancy quiver you promised me you'd make?"

Tony nodded and said, "Is there something you guys need?"

"We just wanted to say hi," Natasha said, coming inside the kitchen with the rest of the group. "Wait, why aren't you in Asgard?"

"Asgard? Since when was he in Asgard?" Steve asked.

"It's confidential," Natasha replied. "Really, Tony, why are you back home?"

In the cabinet, Loki whimpered pathetically out of fear without realizing he did so until after he did it. The noise caused Steve to say, "What was that? It sounded human. I think it came from that cabinet..."

Steve opened the cabinet and it was as if he opened Pandora's box, because the second everyone saw Loki's face, chaos broke out.

"You told me he was dead!" Clint yelled, grabbing Tony by his shirt. "Why is he here? If he's not dead, he should be rotting in a cell in Asgard!"

Tony pushed Clint off of him as Natasha said, "Did you help him escape? Tony, that was dangerous. There might be repercussions for that if they find out."

Loki came out of the cabinet and said, "Barton, if you wish to kill me, I'm allowing you to do it now. I don't want to live."

Clint drew his bow but Natasha took it from him and tackled him to the ground. "If you kill him, Thor will kill you or at least make you suffer for it."

Steve was looking at Loki with pity in his eyes. "Why does he look emaciated?"

"It's complicated," Tony sighed. "All I know is that Asgard's court declared him criminally insane and they put him in a pretty run-down asylum. They were depriving him of his basic needs. They starved him, which is why he's so bony. They only gave him enough water to keep him alive, and he didn't even have a bed to sleep on. And something terrible and sick and just plain wrong happened to him in there. But I can't say it because I doubt Loki would be okay with me telling everyone. Natasha knows it, but like she said, the stuff's confidential."

"That's wrong," Steve said, looking a little angered by what Tony had told him. "Despite what he did, he still deserves food and a bed to sleep on just like everyone else does. Can't they get in trouble for neglecting him?"

"He was considered a special case, so they unfortunately were allowed to neglect his needs," Tony explained.

Clint started yelling at Steve about how Loki was a criminal and deserved punishment. Steve's strong sense of justice made him angered by Clint's words, and despite how Steve hated to yell, the two started shouting at each other. The loud yelling made Iona cry from upstairs loud enough for the Avengers to hear. Steve and Clint stopped fighting.

Loki started going up the stairs but Bruce interrupted him. "Loki, is that crying coming from your baby? I didn't know you had one. Wait, if you were locked in a cell, how did the baby come about?"

"I don't have to tell you how!" Loki snapped, getting defensive. "You wouldn't understand anyway."

"I was just curious," Bruce mumbled. Natasha nudged him, silently telling him to drop it.

"I helped Loki escape because I thought what the asylum staff were doing was wrong," Tony said. "I can't tell you exactly what happened to him because of confidentiality, but one of the healers there abused him."

Steve put two and two together and blanched. "Tony, I hope you're not saying what I think you're saying. Why did they let that happen to him? And how could he have a baby if he's a guy?"

"There are no female frost giants," Tony responded. "They're dual-sexed."

Everyone went silent, unsure of how to respond to Tony's reveal. Loki came back downstairs and shoved Tony up against the wall.

"Why would you tell them that?!" Loki yelled. "I-I thought I could trust you! Why did you let them know that I'm a freak?!"

"You're not a freak," Tony said, his eyes wide with fear. "You're just different."

"Different in a bad way! You know, I'd actually rather be in that asylum alone instead of with you. Because now I know that I can't trust you at all. How could... how could you do this to me? I trusted you, Tony! I really did!"

Loki let Tony go and went upstairs crying.

"Let me talk to him," Natasha told Tony. "I think I could help him calm down."

"Nat, don't," Tony said. "He might get angry at you and hurt you."

"How would he hurt me with how weak he is right now?"

"He wasn't so weak that he couldn't shove Tony," Clint muttered. Natasha jabbed him in the ribs with her elbow and went upstairs anyway.

Tony called for her to come back down, but she didn't. Instead, she found Loki crying in the penthouse bedroom, and carefully sat down next to him. "Tony really shouldn't have told everyone that. He can be such a jerk sometimes. Are you okay?"

"No," Loki sniffled. "No, I'm not. Because the man who was supposed to comfort me just made me feel betrayed."

"Look, I'm sorry about what happened to you. Whoever did that to you was sick and messed up. The rest of the staff should get in trouble for letting a staff member do that to someone. That's a crime."

Loki said nothing and Natasha got up with a sigh. "I'm sorry. I'll leave you alone."

Natasha left the room and Loki started to cry harder.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony takes Loki on a mini-adventure.

Later that night, Tony came up to Loki's room. He saw that it was locked, so he pounded on the door a couple times. He received no answer, so he retrieved the keys to the room and unlocked the door with them. When he came in, he saw that Loki was sitting cross-legged, staring off into space. "Loki? Are you okay?"

Loki nodded but gave no verbal response. Tony sighed and said, "Look, I'm sorry for telling them. I just blurt things out sometimes without thinking. I know it's annoying, but it's a part of who I am. I'm not giving an excuse, just explaining. I hope I haven't completely broken your trust in me."

"I accept your apology, but please don't do something like that ever again," Loki replied, his expression dark. "If you ever do something like that again, I'll kill you."

"I hope you don't actually mean that," Tony said with a shudder. "I want to cheer you up. Would you mind if I took you to some of the best places I know? There's a candy shop I know you'd love, and libraries... I bet you love libraries."

"I do, but I'm not sure if I want to go with you," Loki grit out. "You might just tell everyone else about my... condition."

"I'm not going to," Tony promised, but Loki just glared at him. "Would you stop giving me dirty looks? I don't like being glared at. If you come with me, I'll get you a bunch of candy from the candy shop."

"Fine," Loki sighed. "But only if they have chocolate-covered cherries."

"I'm sure they do. Come on, get up. I have a surprise for you to show you later. I hope it cheers you up."

Loki got dressed and got into Tony's car as Tony sat down in the driver's seat. He was never fond of cars because he always seemed to get carsick, but if he would get chocolate-covered cherries out of it, he supposed a little queasiness was worth it. Their first stop turned out to be the candy shop. Loki walked in with Tony and marveled at all of the candy. There were lollipops on a spinning stand and countless containers of candy with scoops to dish out portions. Of course, Loki got the chocolate-covered cherries first. He then went on to get some gummy worms, Swedish fish, Sour Patch Kids, and butterscotch candies. Tony paid for it all and bought Loki a rainbow unicorn-horn-looking lollipop. He smiled at how happy the god looked licking his lollipop.

"Thank you," Loki said with a smile.

"Just don't eat it all in one sitting," Tony told Loki. "You'll get sick. Now, we're off to the library."

The library Tony took Loki to had an expansive selection of all different kinds of books. Loki picked out a couple books on astronomy as well as a mystery novel. Afterwards, Tony took him to a bookstore, where Loki got a few fantasy novels, several science fiction novels, and a sketchbook.

"You like drawing?" Tony asked curiously. "That's cool. I bet you're good at it. Now we'll go to some clothing stores."

After stops at a few different clothing stores, Loki was carrying bags of clothes for himself, mostly in green and black. Silently, Tony wondered if Loki wore any colors other than green, black, and grey.

Afterwards, Tony took Loki to a park, where Loki swung on the swings like a little kid. The sight made Tony smile and swing with him, each one of them childishly betting who could go higher. He then walked around the park with Loki, appreciating the lush green of the trees and the gentle, cool breeze rustling their leaves. The sky was a lovely shade of azure blue with a few cirrus clouds high up in the sky. Despite the warmth of the sunlight making the top of his head uncomfortably hot, Loki seemed to be enjoying the walk.

For the rest of the afternoon, Tony was window-shopping at fancy stores with Loki. He knew he had more than enough money to purchase a couple nice things for Loki, but the god told him he had already spoiled him enough. Tony found it a bit sad that he thought he didn't deserve much, but he didn't say anything about it.

By the time Loki got back to the tower with Tony, he was bouncing up and down a little on the balls of his feet from excitement. "What's my surprise?"

"You're silly," Tony laughed. "It's not a surprise if I tell you what it is."

Tony covered Loki's eyes and led him into the guest bedroom that had now become Loki's domain. He uncovered Loki's eyes when they had entered the room, smiling when Loki gaped at his surprise.

On top of the bed in the center of it lay exact copies of Loki's armor, including his horned helmet. The tarnished look of his original armor was now replaced by a gleaming gold finish. Next to the pieces of armor was his green cape, leather pants, and his boots. Loki grinned and hugged Tony so hard the mechanic thought he was going to have his ribcage crushed.

"Thank you so much!" Loki exclaimed. "How did you get it all so accurate?"

"I spent a lot of time studying your armor in pictures of you," Tony answered. "I also have some more stuff for you."

Tony opened Loki's closet, revealing a fuzzy teddy bear, a soft, fluffy green blanket, and various scented lotions and bottles of bubble bath. There were also some bottles of essential oils. "I thought it would be nice for you to have some self-care stuff. I chose all of the smells to the lotions and oils to be really relaxing. And the blanket is weighted because I found out that weighted blankets are good for grounding people under mental distress. And then there's the teddy bear you can hug when you're upset. Do you like these other things?"

"Yes, I do," Loki said with a smile as he pulled away from Tony. "Thank you very much. That was really nice of you."

In the evening, Tony and Loki watched some science fiction movies - Tony had discovered from the bookstore trip that Loki enjoyed the science fiction genre. Throughout the movies, Loki was savoring the taste of the chocolate-covered cherries, saving the rest of the candy for later so he wouldn't end up getting sick and throwing up. When Iona started crying for someone to hold her, Loki got her into his arms and hugged her close, rocking her back in forth. Tony's heart warmed when he saw the love in Loki's eyes.

"I never thought I'd say this, but you'll be a good parent," Tony said. "You seem to love her a lot."

"How could I not love this cute little face?" Loki beamed, squishing Iona's face.

Tony smiled and pat the baby's head. "She'll be a wonderful little girl."


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony starts to realize he may have fallen in love with an old enemy.

Tony wasn't very fond of being woken up at 3 in the morning, but he didn't want to yell at Loki. He just sighed and gave Loki a withering look. "What is it?"

"I had a nightmare. Can I sleep next to you?" Loki asked timidly, wringing his hands.

"Sure. Just don't kick me in your sleep when you fall back asleep."

Loki carefully climbed into the bed and snuggled next to Tony. Tony felt incredibly uncomfortable, but at the same time, he was feeling a pleasant sort of nervousness. The nervousness didn't feel bad at all, but it still made his brain swim and his heart beat faster. Completely unsure of why he was feeling that way, he just let Loki nestle into his warmth and tried not to complain about how cold Loki's skin was. He wondered if it was from his frost giant heritage - Thor had once said something about Loki's heritage. Tony secretly wanted to see Loki in his frost giant form, but he had no idea how to ask it of Loki or if he should even ask in the first place.

In his sleep, Loki started actually cuddling with Tony. Tony's face felt as if it was on fire and he had to resist the strong urge to push the Asgardian off. It was so uncomfortable, he thought, to feel a nice sense of nervousness and a not-so-nice sense of awkwardness at the same time. He wondered why he was feeling the former but couldn't come up with an answer.

Tony fell back asleep, trying not to think about how nice Loki's cold skin felt.

In the morning, Tony woke up to the warmth of sunlight streaming through the window. The light felt nice and warm on his skin and when he looked out the window, he could see a beautiful sunrise. It painted the sky with lovely shades of pink, red, and purple. He appreciated it for a moment and then nudged Loki to wake him up. Loki woke up with a yawn and a simultaneous stretch.

"Good morning," Tony said. "I want to ask you something if that's okay with you."

"Go ahead as long as it's not a stupid question."

"Well, I've read a bit about the frost giants and they seem pretty interesting. So I was wondering if you could show me your Jotun form."

Loki's eyes narrowed and he gave Tony a death glare. "Why are you even asking that? I'm a monster, Tony! Do you really want to see that side of me?"

"Yes."

"You know, for a genius, you can be quite stupid sometimes," Loki said with a roll of his eyes. "Fine. But only because I want you to leave me alone."

Loki hesitated for a moment before shifting to his Jotun form. His pale skin turned a beautiful shade of blue and his green eyes changed to red, even in his sclera. Raised markings appeared as well and Tony gasped, taking it all in. Oddly, he didn't find Loki to be as monstrous as Loki thought his frost giant appearance was. Instead, he was captivated. He felt like he couldn't take his eyes off of Loki.

"Wow," Tony said, eyes wide with amazement. He couldn't stop marveling Loki's appearance. "You look amazing. I-I've never seen anything like that. You may hate this form of yours, but I find it beautiful. You're absolutely gorgeous."

Loki's eyes widened and he went silent for a few moments. Once he had gathered his thoughts enough to respond, he said, "You think I'm beautiful? Tony, I'm a monster. You must be kidding."

"I'm not."

Loki's blue cheeks flushed a deep purple, and Tony smiled a little at the Asgardian's display of surprise. He ran his fingers over the raised markings. Loki twitched a bit, but let Tony touch his markings.

"Are these scars?" Tony asked.

"No, they're just hereditary markings," Loki answered. "Every Jotun is born with them, and they vary depending on the parents of them. I have the royal markings because my biological father was the king of Jotunheim. However, I killed him to save my adoptive father."

"You killed your own dad?" Tony asked. "Wow... I mean, I know you've killed a lot of people, but that seems a little extreme."

"He was about to kill Odin and I knew Thor would kill me if I let his father die. Anyway, I just still can't believe that you find me beautiful. It feels... nice. Really nice. It's kind of making me happy."

"I'm glad you're feeling happy," Tony said with a smile, something that he thought he would never say. Then again, a lot of things had changed ever since he took Loki under his wing. He actually had started to enjoy the god's company despite how Loki had inadvertently caused his PTSD. Strangely, he had almost forgiven him, but not entirely. Loki had still done a lot of damage and Tony wasn't quite ready to let that go completely.

Loki smiled, shifted back to his regular form, and went to feed Iona. 

****************  
Over the next few weeks, Loki started looking healthier, and so did Iona. Although he was still thin, his gauntness was gone and his eyes were no longer glazed over with hunger. They were brighter than Tony had ever seen them, a beguiling viridian that never failed to captivate Tony. His dry, matted hair had become shiny, though it was still quite long. With Loki's consent, Tony gave Loki a haircut so his hair fell just to his shoulders. Loki seemed happier after the haircut for some reason. Loki's good looks were only intensified by the purposely tight clothing he wore. The skin-tight leather pants he loved to wear showed off his lean legs, and the shirts he wore complimented his wiry physique. Tony caught himself staring at Loki sometimes and hoped that the god wouldn't notice. He often distracted himself by reading stories to the other's baby. Iona had started to become more outgoing, though at only just a bit over a month old, she wasn't saying any actual words. She babbled happily nearly all of the time, curiously touching things and smelling them. Both Tony and Loki found this behavior of hers a bit annoying but still endearing.

Tony started having dreams about Loki as well. They all consisted of him cuddling with Loki - something innocent that was also intimate. Tony always woke up from the dreams with a red face and butterflies in his stomach. Exactly a month from when he had taken Loki in, Tony saw Loki wearing an outfit that made him look even more attractive than usual. He was wearing a white button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up - the only non-green and non-black thing Tony had ever seen Loki wear- and jeans that flattered his long legs.

Tony had decided that it was now or never - he had to tell Loki about the way he was feeling. He walked up to Loki and said, "I hope this doesn't sound awkward, but I find you really attractive."

Loki looked at him with surprise in his eyes. "You find me attractive? Well... that's very nice of you. You don't look too bad yourself."

Loki winked and Tony's face felt as if it was on fire. Gently, he came closer to Loki and kissed him. The god's eyes widened and he blushed in the most wonderful way Tony had ever seen someone blush.

"That felt good," Loki said, his reddened face accentuating his sharp cheekbones. "I-I like you too."

Tony smiled and kissed Loki again. The god kissed him back, running his hands through Tony's hair. He wrapped his arms around Tony's waist, pulling him closer as if his life depended on having Tony close to him. His kisses became more hungry, more desperate, something that sparked a fire inside Tony. He matched Loki's rougher kissing, and it wasn't long before he felt an erection against his thigh as well as one of his own. He stroked Loki through his jeans but the god pushed him away.

"I'm sorry, but I don't want to do that," Loki said, "that" meaning sex. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry," Tony told him. "I'm sorry for touching you like that. I didn't mean to make you feel unsafe."

"You didn't," Loki assured Tony. "Could you hold me? It would make me feel safe."

Tony nodded and wrapped his arms around Tony as he lay down. He stroked Loki's hair, smiling when Loki blinked sleepily with a small smile on his face. Soon, the god was asleep, but Tony kept stroking his hair anyway. He eventually got up and fed Iona, but he came back to Loki.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> S.H.I.E.L.D finds Loki and what they do sends him off the deep end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for this chapter but it's going to advance the plot.

In the middle of breakfast the next morning, Tony heard banging on the door. Loki startled at the loud noise and stopped eating. When Tony opened the door, he came face to face with a squad of armed guards and three S.H.I.E.L.D agents. Tony recognized one of them as Maria Hill.

"We found out that you're housing a war criminal," Agent Hill said. "Loki Laufeyson. Why are you housing someone who nearly destroyed New York City?"

"It's complicated" was all Tony could say. He noticed that Loki had disappeared, presumably to hide. After an awkward silence between Tony and the agents, Loki showed up again, this time right in front of the agents and guards. He was standing firmly, looking the guards straight in the eye.

"I've already been punished enough back in Asgard," Loki grit out. "There's no need for any of you to give me a worse punishment."

The guards advanced closer to Loki and suddenly, Tony heard Iona crying, likely because of loneliness. Loki had just fed her and played with her before breakfast but apparently 30 minutes without seeing her mother was too long.

"Why is there a baby in here?" one of the guards asked.

"She's mine," Loki replied. "She's in here because I need to take care of her."

"You shouldn't even be around children," Hill said coolly. "You're not a suitable caretaker. In order to prevent her from harm, we'll need to take her into custody and find a better caretaker for her."

The other two agents started going towards Iona's crib and Loki panicked. "No! You can't take her away from me! That's kidnapping!"

"I didn't know you were concerned with laws," the same guard who asked about Iona said. "Considering you've broken nearly every law in existence."

Loki's nerves were on fire with anger but instead of attacking the guard, he ran up to Iona and took her out of the arms of one of the agents. The guards had followed him up and had their guns pointed at him.

"You're not going to take her from me," Loki hissed.

"Maybe she'd be better off if she died before he could kill her," one of the guards said to his partner. Loki's eyes widened and he felt as if his heart stopped when he heard a gunshot.

Iona had tumbled to the floor. She was crying harder than Loki had ever heard her cry and it took Loki a second to process what had just happened. The guard had shot her. Loki screamed and rushed to his daughter's side, starting to cry himself.

"I'm sorry, baby girl, I'm sorry," Loki said as she shook. "I'm sorry. Please don't leave me! Please!"

The blood continued to blossom from the bullet wound in Iona's chest and she continued to wail. Loki felt as if his heart was being torn into two. He put pressure to the wound and told her again and again to stay with him, but it did nothing. After about a minute, Iona had stopped crying, but not because she had become okay again. Loki saw that her eyes were wide open and she had stopped breathing.

Loki screamed louder than he had ever screamed in his life. In a blind rage, he threw the shooter to the ground and started beating him bloody. Tony ran to Loki and blanched when he saw what had happened.

"No," Tony said shakily. "No. You've got to be kidding me. Iona, can you hear me?"

There was a long silence as the guards and agents left and Tony realized Loki's beloved child was dead.

"Oh my god, I'm sorry," Tony told Loki. "Are you okay? Did they hurt you too?"

"She was so young," Loki said distantly. "Only a little over a month old. My... my baby..."

Loki was sobbing and shaking uncontrollably, but soon, his crying stopped only to be replaced by a blank stare off into space and silence. Tony shook Loki to try and snap him out of it but he got no answer.

"Loki? Loki, can you hear me? Please respond," Tony begged. "Say something."

Loki said nothing. Tony picked him up and carried him to the couch. He felt his forehead but found no fever. Loki's heart and breathing were just fine but he was completely unresponsive. Tony found that when moved into different positions, Loki's body stayed stiff.

After remembering what Loki had told him about his mental state back in the asylum, Tony realized that Loki had gone catatonic. He still tried everything he could think of to make him snap out of it - waving his hand in front of Loki's face, shining a flashlight at him, playing loud music, and throwing ice water on him. Now Loki was drenched and still stiff and Tony had no idea what to do. He realized that until Loki got out of his catatonic state, he would have to take care of the god.

The responsibility of it all made Tony's head swim. He decided to leave Loki alone for now so he could have some time to think about just how he was going to go about taking care of someone who didn't respond to anything. Just thinking about the subject made Tony feel helpless. He was good at taking care of and fixing machines, but taking care of people was unfamiliar territory for him. Still, he fed Loki soup and gave him water, though he had to force Loki to swallow. That was no easy task with how stiff Loki was.

Tony and Bruce were almost finished with the designer medication they were constructing for Loki, but both of them wondered if it would even do anything to snap Loki out of his catatonia. After all, it was surprisingly difficult to force someone to swallow a pill.

Out of good heart, Steve and Natasha started helping Tony out. Tony still had to do the essential things, but Natasha read books to Loki and Steve had one-way conversations with him. Loki, to Tony's delight, started to move slightly, but he was still almost completely unresponsive. Tony forced himself to stay hopeful but it was hard to have a bright outlook when the man he cared about didn't even talk to him anymore. Some nights, he broke down and begged Loki to say something even though he knew it was useless.

Tony didn't believe in a higher power but he prayed to gods from several religions, asking them to help Loki wake up. One day, he got angry and started yelling at Loki.

"I get it, your kid died!" Tony shouted. "I was upset too! But I'm not being a vegetable! I'm at least _responding_ to things and being productive. But you? You're just moping around! I have to do everything for you. _Everything._ I have to feed you, clothe you, and even bathe you! Do you know how depressing it is to have one-sided conversations with someone? I'm doing that so you'll wake up but you're not waking up at all! You're not even trying!"

To Tony's surprise, he got a response.

"Stop," Loki said. However, that was all he said and as soon as he had responded, he fell back into catatonia.

Tony stopped.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki wakes up and Tony tries to make sure justice is served. Also, Loki bonds with Steve and Natasha.

Tony was spending some time alone in his workshop when he heard footsteps coming towards him. He nearly jumped off of his stool when he saw who they belonged to. Loki was somehow back in the land of the living. He looked a little paler than usual, probably from not getting enough sunlight, but other than that, he looked healthy. He studied Tony for a moment, as if he were trying to decide if the mechanic was a hallucination or not.

"Where's my baby?" Loki asked. Tony shivered at those words. Did Loki really forget about what sent him into catatonia?

"Iona got killed. Don't you remember?" Tony replied.

"Oh. Yes, yes I do," Loki answered, his tone casual as if he were remembering what the date was. "Curse Ammons."

"Ammons? Who's Ammons?"

"That's the last name of the vile creature who shot Iona," Loki said through grit teeth. "I want him dead."

Tony knew the god wasn't upset with him, but seeing him angry always struck fear in him. He considered Loki to be dangerous even when he wasn't upset, so he viewed an angry Loki as especially fearsome. He stifled the fear building in his chest and said, "I would feel happy if he was dead too, but you can't go after him. S.H.I.E.L.D. will find you and likely do experiments on you. Or just punish you. Anyway, he'll die when it's his time to die. Don't worry about it."

"Don't worry about it?!" Loki snapped. "My child is dead and you expect me to just be okay with everything? You know, you're even more insensitive than I thought you were, _Stark._ It's all your fault! If you came up sooner and stopped Ammons from shooting, Iona would still be alive! She's dead and it's all because of you!"

"It's not my fault!" Tony yelled back. "You can't blame me for this. I wasn't the one who shot her. Have you forgotten that I saved you from a life in a run-down asylum? I helped you escape, I gave you and Iona food, and I gave both of you a place to stay! But you don't even remember that, do you? All you remember is the bad things so you can bitch to me about them later! You're so spiteful and vindictive! All you care about is getting revenge on people who haven't even wronged you! I-I can't believe you!"

"And I can't believe you, you _sjofel stykke av avskum!"_

Tony froze for a moment, trying to figure out what that meant. Whatever it meant, it wasn't nice, so he just walked out of his workshop, leaving Loki alone. He quickly realized how stupid that was, but he didn't go back. Only five minutes had passed when Loki came up to him.

"I'm sorry," Loki said, shaking a little - probably from anxiety, Tony figured. "I can be such a jerk sometimes. I was just angry. It's not your fault that Iona died. It's Ammons' fault and I'm sorry for blaming you."

"I accept your apology," Tony replied after a moment. "But please don't yell at me like that again or insult me in a language I don't speak. Anyway, I'm going to make sure that he gets what he deserves. I'm also going to make sure that what happened never happens again to someone else."

Loki nodded and went to lie down on the couch. He watched the news while Tony prepared a breakfast of French toast and scrambled eggs. Loki devoured his serving when Tony gave it to him - apparently the myths weren't lying about Loki's appetite. After breakfast, Tony got on his tablet and messaged Natasha. Though she and Loki didn't exactly get along when they met, she seemed to no longer mind Loki. That made Tony think she would help him out.

Natasha turned out to be furious at what happened. She promised that she would talk to Nick Fury about the murder of Iona. Tony didn't bother asking Clint for help since the archer still held a grudge against Loki, instead opting to ask Bruce. Bruce, ever so reliable, agreed that he would help the agents and guards present, including Ammons, would get what was coming to them. Steve and Thor seemed to be the most upset about the news and made it known that they would help Tony out.

At noon, Tony got an unexpected visitor that thankfully turned out to be Steve. Tony let him in, not expecting him to sit down next to Loki.

"Hey," Steve greeted Loki. Loki snapped out of his TV-watching trance and turned to face the captain. "I'm really sorry about what happened to Iona. She was a wonderful little girl and it's saddening that she's gone. But you still have happy memories of the time you spent with her, right? I was thinking that we could put together a scrapbook that you could look at whenever you're upset about it. Turns out that Tony was taking pictures of you two all the time, but I don't think you noticed."

Loki smiled and eagerly got to work with the supplies Steve had brought. The captain didn't trust him with scissors, so Loki did the gluing while Steve trimmed the photos to fit. They had been printed with a glossy finish that looked nice with the ribbon frame the two put around each of the pictures. By 1:00 PM, Steve and Loki had finished a scrapbook of all the happy memories Loki and Iona had shared. Loki thanked Steve and put the scrapbook on the end table to dry.

Steve gave Loki a gourmet lollipop he had brought for him - cotton candy to be specific - and left with a smile in Loki's direction. The lollipop cheered Loki up almost instantly, and Tony had trouble trying not to laugh at how happy the god was over a piece of candy.

"You seem to be really happy," Tony remarked. "That's good. Steve's idea was a really good one. Now whenever you're upset, you'll have something to cheer you up and make you remember all the good times you had with her."

Loki nodded and continued to lick his lollipop. The way he licked it was oddly sexual, though he most likely didn't mean for it to be. Tony left the room so he wouldn't get hard in front of Loki.

Yet another unexpected visitor showed up. Natasha was holding a tall pile of books, all hardcover - that made Tony realize just how strong she was. She was smiling and even gave a cheerful little wave to Tony.

"Do you want something?" Tony sighed. "Usually when people act as friendly as you're acting, they want something from me."

"No, but I thought it'd be nice for Loki to have some more books," Natasha said. "He seems like he'd finish them fast."

Tony took the books from her, but he didn't expect her to follow him inside. "I never said you could come in."

"You never said I couldn't," Natasha quipped. Tony rolled his eyes and said she could come in. She sat next to Loki on the couch.

"I think we got off on the wrong foot," she said. "And I'm not going to forgive you for New York, but you seem different now. Not entirely different, but different enough that I think it makes no sense to waste energy hating you. I got you some books that Tony apparently put down on the armchair. Anyway, I'm sorry that Iona died. She was so cute.. she died way too young. I still can't believe that someone would shoot an innocent person, especially a baby. But I told Director Fury about it and hopefully he should be able to do something about it."

"Thank you," Loki said with a small smile, pausing from licking his lollipop. "I'm still upset that she's dead because she was my main reason to live. Without her, I just feel... empty."

"I can understand that. And you have a right to grieve for as long as you need to. There isn't a set time that you need to get over it by. Maybe you'll never fully get over it, but that's fine. Take as much time as you need to mourn her, but if you can, don't dwell on it. By the way, Tony and I gave her a funeral. We made a little boat for her and went to the nearest lake. We put her in the boat with the clothes Tony got for her and set the boat on fire. I think that's how Asgardians do funerals."

"It is. Thank you so much."

Natasha nodded with a smile and changed the channel to AMC. "Wanna watch _The Walking Dead_ with me? It's a show about a zombie apocalypse."

Loki said yes and for an hour-long episode, they sat together watching the show. When the episode ended, Natasha got up. "I should probably get going. Make sure to read those books."

Loki nodded and continued to watch _The Walking Dead._ Tony sat down and watched it with him. He started to play with Loki's hair, which seemed to make the god relax even more. Loki fell asleep and Tony carefully put his arms around him, holding him close.

It was the happiest Tony had felt in a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Sjofel stykke av avskum" means "vile piece of scum" in Norwegian, the closest I could get to Old Norse. I used Google Translate, though, so the translation might not be accurate.


End file.
